Interview of Ants

Ben Wilson, James Wrighton, Elliott Tiney and Andy Spiers let Telegraph news editor Lucy Wood into their alternative world…

Do you have “proper” jobs?
Jim: Erm excuse me…What is not proper about comedy?
Ben: Jimmy forgets that yesterday we spent the morning wearing plastic ‘rodent noses’ and the afternoon doing impressions of ‘Boicie’ from Only Fools and
Els: The nice thing about being in a comedy sketch group is that you can waste hours and hours being silly with your mates and call it ‘work’.
Andy: And any snacks you eat while your doing it are tax deductible. Yum…tax Pringles.

Quite a lot of your sketches involve manly displays of affection. Do you just love snogging each other or is there something we should know?

Els: There is something you should know…Idiots of Ants are very much in love!
Andy: Plus…whenever Idiots of Ants kiss a tree is planted in the rain forest.

You clearly know each other incredibly well. What bad habits do you have?
Ben: Flatulence is a chronic problem within the IOA camp.
Jim: Our diet is so bad we can clear entire streets when one of us ‘goes off’.
Els: Although it does have its advantages on the busy morning commute.

What are your biggest weaknesses?

Andy: Ben
Jimmy: Ben
Els: Ben
Ben: Me.

When do you feel at your best?
Ben: We love doing a good gig.
Els: It doesn’t matter how many people see us as long as they’ve enjoyed it.
Andy: Also we are in a lucky position where people actually want to see us…which is great.
Jim: Go out, make people laugh and have a pint. Not a bad job at the end of the day.

What did you want to be when you were 12 years old?
Ben: I remember wanting to be a wrestler like Hulk Hogan.
Els: What would your wrestling name have been?
Ben: Big Ben or Ben the Barbarian.
Andy: At that time in my life I just wanted pubic hair, it was all I cared about. I am pleased to tell you all that I now have loads. If any thing I’ve got too much.
Jim: Its true. He’s not allowed to go swimming.

What do you think of last thing at night?
Els: Ladies boobies. Next question.

What did you dream of last night?
Jim: I was in a hotel room with Andy. The snoring was so load that I didn’t sleep.
Ben: It’s crazy how loud it is. It’s like Wooly Mammoth shouting.

Which super power would you like to have and why?
Els: We are like any teenage boy, we don’t mind which super power we end up with, as long as it enables us to see naked ladies.
Jim: I wanted to be able to wear my underpants outside my trousers without looking demented.
Ben: I actually got bitten by a radioactive moth and developed the ability to constantly head butt light bulbs.
Andy: You couldn’t fly?
Ben: No…just the head butting.

If you were a cartoon character, who would it be and why?
Andy: I’d be the little man on the gents toilet door because he gets to hang out in bars all of the time!
Els: Does that mean you’d only get go on dates with the lady symbol?
Andy: Yes…but she’s great. A real laugh.

Do you have any tips to beat the credit crunch?
Ben: Our big tip for saving money is doing interviews in local newspapers in which we encourage the readership to buy us pints when we do gigs in their town…
Jim: Hi everybody! Why not buy ‘idiots of ants’ a pint.
Andy: Just one. We are happy to share it.
Elliott: Or you can stay in and watch some free comedy online at
Ben: We are such publicity whores!

Who wouldn’t you mind being stuck in a lift with?
Jim: A lift mechanic, a man who’s reading a book on fixing lifts and a bloke who lectures on ‘the theory of lift mechanics’ at the university of lifts.

What shocking secret can you tell us about yourself?
Els: It depends how easily you get shocked.
Jim: I’m hairy like a monkey, Andy has eleven toes, Ben is a ballet enthusiast.
Ben: Only Russian!
Jim: And Elliott once killed a man.
Els: He was the fifth member of Idiots of Ants…three to go.

What’s the worst that can happen?
Ben: We could all get sent to prison for crimes against comedy.
Els: Unfortunately comedy prison is just as horrible as proper prison.
Jim: Except you only eat custard pies
Andy: And the prison yard is strewn with banana skins and whoopee cushions.

Five star hotel or a tent in the woods?
Ben: Silly question. Hotel. We are not manly or butch. And we’ll have a room with a view please.
Andy: And a trouser press…

Is laughter really the best medicine?
Ben: Of course. That’s why hospitals are so much fun.
Els: Our comedy medicine is so potent that it needs a childproof cap.
Ben: What does that mean?
Els: I don’t know…

Describe Idiots of Ants in one sentence.
Ben: We are a comedy sketch poop.
Els: POOP!?
Ben: Troop! I meant troop! Oh no! I ruined my one sentence.

Interview by Lucy Wood and taken from the Grimsby Telegraph 2009


4 Responses to “Interview of Ants”

  1. Catherine on 10 May 2010, 6:33 am

    Oh my gosh! You gays are so damn funny! I’d like to see you in Sherbrooke, Qc, one of these days! Please, continu on that way! Luv ya. xoxo

  2. Abbey on 20 October 2010, 7:47 pm

    HAHA. Saw you guys in Brighton last night for the second time. First saw you at Latitude festival 2010. You were so funny both times. Keep up the amazing work and come to Brighton again please x

  3. Harry on 22 February 2011, 11:44 am

    You were so funny! I saw you guys at Felsted School!

    Come back!

  4. Morgan on 29 October 2011, 6:52 pm

    “When do you feel at your best?
    Els: It doesn’t matter how many people see us as long as they’ve enjoyed it.”

    Thanks to the awesome power of the internet, you boys have made your way to Indiana University, USA! My shocking secret: I once dislocated my knee dancing like Elvis Presley. Keep up the comedy, fella, I’ll be sure to write a thank you letter to Youtube for throwing you on my recommended list.

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